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Don’t Call Us, We’ll Call You…Part 1

There are all kind of rich people in LA, but basically they break into two categories. A. Those humble despite being rich and  B. Those who need flash around their money.

As a Los Angeles matchmaker I’ve got a lot of inquiries from both types, but people group A are generally the people I like take on as clients.

I can tell what kind of rich person a client is from our first meeting, sometimes even over the phone.

The client from group A, tending to be hardworking, realistic, and laid back despite having millions in the bank. They have worked hard to get where they are, and don’t show it off.

They are generally looking for a long-term relationship or marriage with woman who is intelligent, classy, beautiful, and cultured. These clients tend put very little stock in what the person looks like. As long as a potential match is healthy, fit, and takes care of themselves, they are happy. These are guys that want a genuine connection with someone who could possibly be the love of their life.

And then there are potential clients that are group B…these guys are all flash, no personality. When I ask them what they are looking for they give me a laundry list of physical qualities that she should have, including that she should look like Victoria’s Secret model, that her measurements should be 36-24-26, that she should have been Dallas Cheerleader and if possible that she looks exactly like Meghan Fox. They don’t want anyone over 30…and no one over a size 4.

When I ask group B guys “What about her personality?”….They stare at me blankly as if I’m speaking ancient greek.

For some reason all of these guys all ..these tend to have assistants who assistants who have assistants…they tend to take me out to the most expensive restaurant in LA  prove how rich they are…the thing is, as long as they are good person, I don’t really care.

When I started out two years ago, I dealt with a lot more of these types of men, now having interviewed many potential clients like this, I know who to look for.

As a matchmaker, part of my job is meeting with potential clients and weeding out undesirable ones so my female clients don’t have to go on dates with them.

One of the first clients I interviewed was from group B.

He took me to lunch at The Cut at the Beverly Wilshire and brought his assistant with him (who brings their assistant to lunch?…People in Beverly Hills.)

I had actually never even talked to him, though I had become so close with his assistant we had become friends and I added her to my database.

When I arrived, everything went okay until I  asked him what he was looking for.

He wanted to meet a “stripper or porn star” and then proceeded to tell me he didn’t wan to date anyone smarter than him.

I wanted too him ” I think we are fresh out of strippers and porn stars”, but continued to listen to him, hoping he was just kidding.

He then proceeded to give me the THE exact measurements of his ideal “Barbie doll.”

By this time I was preparing to tell him ” Don’t call us, we’ll call you.” when his second assistant showed up late with keys to one of his lamborginis…that’s right…plural, I think he must breed them in his spare time.

Who bring their assistant’s assistant to lunch?…once again people in Beverly Hills…

He barked at her for not having his Lamborghini washed at a certain car wash…He then requested that if went out on a date with a girl…she should wear a dress that could match his yellow car…Oy.

By this time, the phrase ” Don’t call us, we’ll call you was on the tip of my tongue, when he said something that completely shocked me.

” I am want a girl that’s wholesome…one who I can bring home to mom.”

So I am tallying this all up in my head.

Brainless.Check. Wholesome. Check. Porn star. Check. Looks good in taxi cab yellow.Check.

Don’t us…we’ll call you.

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