Relationships are ended every day, yet the potential for hurt and ill feelings among the rejected party is tremendous. Things come to end as a natural phase of life, yet things like relationship can be ended with finesse and grace and leave the wounded party with a sense of satisfied closure.
Do unto others as you would like them to do unto you. Try to be as honest as possible in ending a relationship. Never lie about the reason for ending the relationship. This can cause hurt feelings as well as leave persons with an open wound. Honesty brings a natural end to things.
Do not cast guilt on the person on the losing end if it is not deserved. When relationships are ended because one person causes another person to feel guilty wrongfully, the person on the receiving end will normally try his or her best to make up for the guilt, thereby prolonging the process of closure. They normally try to make things better thinking that if they do right, their spouse or partner will not end the relationship.
Do not accept gifts or favours from persons whom you told or intend to break up with. This sends mix signals and will leave the person/s feeling used or taken for granted. I’ll feelings normally result as a consequence of this and can lead to bitterness, strife and even violence.
Do not flaunt your new love in your old love face. This can lead to jealousy and violence.
Talk it over. It is always good to sit down with the person you are breaking up with and have a healthy, heart to heart conversation about why things must end. This shows that you respect the person enough to have dialogue with them and will usually result in platonic good-natured friendships are the relationship is ended.
Do not patronize your ex. Never be the first one to offer to remain friends after the relationship is ended. This may seem callous to the person who is hurting or on the receiving end. Let them be the one to first offer to be friends after they have been impressed with the way you handled ending the relationship.
Do not involve your friend friends’ in a negative way. It is always best to leave third-party out of the relationship that is being ended. Both persons in the relationship that is being ended will need the support of their friends. Things can be a bit tricky if you both share the same friends. If that is the case, do not try to get them to take sides; allow them to support you both without bias if this is possible. Do not spread bad talk or give bad messages about the person you are ending the relationship with. You both will need your established friendships and ill gossip could really hurt the process of healing.
Be gracious, kind and vocal in your compliments of the past relationship. If the relationship was a good one, let the person with whom you are ending the relationship know that it was good while it lasted. If they offer to remain good friends after the relationship is over, accept good-naturedly and return an offer of friendship.
Finally, live in peace with the family. Normally when relationships are ended, the family’s of the respective parties normally take sides and this can be particularly tricky when children are involved. Try to be at peace with your ex’s family at all times if possible. If good relations can be maintained, this will be healthy for both parties and will create a safe, happy and normalized setting for children if they are involved.
The key to remember in ending relationships is that you should do unto others as you would like them to do unto you and if you live and love graciously, your good works and your ways will follow you. It pays to be gracious.
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