When it comes to attracting a woman there is the male way of thinking, and then there is the female way. Men, you usually get it wrong! If you want to be more successful when it comes to seducing a woman it is better to do it with full knowledge of the woman’s perspective. I have asked women what they wish men knew about attracting a woman and here is seven important tips I learned.
1. Those games you play will hurt you more than help you.
You know the kind of games I’m talking about? You say you’ll call, then you wait two days or three days or whatever arbitrary time the Cool-Guy Protocol tells you to wait. If she gave you her phone number, she’s hoping you’ll call. Keeping her guessing just annoys her.
2. Women really do like nice guys.
Contrary to what you might have heard, a woman is not going to go for a total jerk. She’s not into wimps either (which is probably where that myth originates), but there is a vast middle-ground between patsy and thug. Explore it.
3. Confidence is sexier than good looks.
Since the word can mean different things to men and women, it’s probably worth pointing out what confidence is not. Confidence is not boastful, loud, or obnoxious. Confidence doesn’t make promises it can’t or doesn’t intend to keep. Confidence is about knowing who you are and being comfortable with that.
4. Emotional security is more important than financial security.
I know you don’t want to hear it, guys, but being in touch with your emotional side, and sharing that side with a woman, is about the sexiest thing you can do. Open up a little. Tell her what you’re feeling. Share your hopes, your fears, the likes and dislikes you don’t usually talk about. Just remember: the more you share, the less you’ll have to face that dreaded question, “What are you thinking?”
5. Who your friends are says a lot about who you are.
Sure, everyone has a few obnoxious friends. But nice guys generally also have nice friends. You remember point number 2, that women like nice guys, right? Good. Try not to let your friends determine what her first impression of you will be.
6. Little things mean a lot.
A small gesture of affection, especially offered at random and for no particular reason, will always win you big bonus points in her eyes. Flowers, a card, a little gift you give her “just because”, a note or text during the day to say you’re thinking of her. Or try some random acts of chivalry. Pull out her chair for her, or hold the door.
7. She needs reassurance sometimes.
At the heart of it, she’s not all that different from you. If you’re fretting your way through, worried that you’ll say the wrong thing, she’s also worried that she’ll come across as a complete dork. She’s likely beset by worries that she’s not pretty enough, not the right kind of pretty, or not sexy enough, that no guy would ever want to get involved with her. Yes, women have those fears as much as men do. So reassure her. Make sure she knows how beautiful and desirable she is. Trust me that if you do, she’ll make it worth your while.